Rather than do a traditional Thanksgiving this year, we opted for a weekend getaway – only starting Saturday night. We drove to Horseshoe Bay Ferry terminal, and crossed to the Sunshine Coast (Langdale) terminal, and from there, up to Rockwater Resort in Secret Cove (Halfmoon Bay).
We arrived late on Saturday night to a simple room; it wasn’t until morning that we realized what a stunning view we had. A great boardwalk lines the property, and there are several other great vantage points.
We had a lovely breakfast, but if we had been able to hold out till 11 AM, we could have had a wider selection of savoury fare. Later, we took a dip in the water, but no one seemed brave enough to try the cold ocean water. In fact, we travelled to the nearby town of Sechelt, and took advantage of the Aquatic Centre there. There was supposed to be a water slide, but we still managed to enjoy other features like the diving board, sauna and lazy river.
We had a great lunch at a restaurant called El Segundo – the menu was suggestive of fusion between latin American and Asian cuisines. After returning to the resort, we found a nearby Geocache, and my wife got a massage. I also took a quick dip in the ocean water, just to be able to say I did it.
For dinner, we returned to Sechelt to go to a restaurant called Buccaneers (the resort restaurant dinner seemed like it would be crowded), then we capped off our evening with a romantic couples walk on the same boardwalk, but lit for night-time.
Unfortunately, the eco marine tour I had planned for Monday was accidentally booked for Sunday, meaning we had missed our slot. I also hadn’t reserved our ferry ride back, so between worrying about how to get home and the incoming rain, we opted to leave the resort after breakfast. We got on the second ferry we could, after missing the first one by only one car slot. Waiting for the next ferry could have been worse as we did manage to spot a dolphin at one point. We also ensured that we had our final dinner in Langley at one of our favourite restaurants, Brodeur’s Bistro, which has a blend of Cajun and French Canadian food.
If we manage to find our way back to the Sunshine Coast, I hope we can fit in some sea kayaking, mountain biking or even just hiking.
2 years ago, we were invited on a hike with a group of families. We thought it would be a great way to meet like-minded people, and the first organized outing was to Stawamus Chief Provincial Park, just outside Squamish. I won’t describe the misadventure of that outing, but we realized we might be more on the beginner side when it comes to hiking terrain that is more vertical than our old stomping grounds in Ontario, and we were not able to all stick with the group. It’s always bugged me that we weren’t able to make it to the peak as a complete family, and this past weekend, we had a chance to redeem ourselves.
They do try to warn you.
My eldest remembered how the old held back the young last time and wanted free reign to hike ahead; he’s almost 15 so we allowed it (having him rush us would only make keeping a sustainable pace more frustrating.
The Lightning Kid wanted to go off the trail to climb various cliff faces he could see; we tried to prevent that as we knew he’d need to save his energy. I was soon proven right, as the trail morphed from trail to rocks to stairs to rocks again. Going up that steep a climb will blow up your cardiovascular system, but luckily the Lightning Kid was willing to let Mom and Dad catch their breath. Eventually, Mom got into a flow and it was the Lightning Kid who needed more breaks.
We reached the approximate 3/4 mark where we had separated last time, and resolved ourselves to keep going. Eventually, we got to some parts where I wish I had taken more pictures; the rocky steep terrain had chains and ladders at various intervals enable climbing higher. We paced ourselves, and picked our footing carefully, with everyone choosing when to use hands, handholds, etc. and when they felt comfortable walking.
The summit provided us with views that made all the sweating, huffing and puffing worth it.
Heading back down was mostly easier, but not so gentle on middle-aged joints, so there was less need for breaks to catch our breath, but we still found ourselves having to pace ourselves to not twist an ankle or jam a knee etc.
Another big family hike in the books, with only the question of whether Stawamus Chief Peaks #2 and #3 are as hard…?
Combining a race with a camping trip worked back in 2014 when we went to Rattlesnake Point (as mentioned here), so why not try something similar here in B.C.? In both cases, we felt rusty to the point of feeling like camping novices, so we tried to manage our expectations…
After work and school on Friday, we rushed up to our campsite in Cultus Lake Provincial Park in the hopes of setting up our tent with the maximum amount of daylight. Our campsite had few trees within a reasonable distance to put up a tarp, and the ground was poured cement intended for trailers and RVs (yet not smooth like a sidewalk) so sinking tent pegs was impossible too. Did I mention it was raining?
Once the tent was up and secure, we ventured into town for pizza. Beethoven’s pizza is somewhat locally famous so we were looking forward to it, but it was about to close as we arrived. Luckily the Lakeside Beach Club was open and served us some fabulous food, including the best Jambalaya I’ve ever had.
After dinner, we went back to the campsite and were going to inflate our air mattresses and get set up for the night. But between dead batteries (we found some spares) and being unable to figure out the air pump in the dark, we ultimately (around 10:30 PM) threw in the towel and decided to stay dry and comfy at home for the first night.
It had been a rough night and a rough week beforehand, so we didn’t get out to the site till after noon on Saturday. We stopped by the race site to pick up my race kit and drop off my bike. We encountered more rain as we got the rest of our stuff deployed into the tent, but in the late afternoon it seemed to clear up, so we took advantage of the lake to go swimming.
With the rain well in the past, we were able to have a proper camp dinner with hot dogs, beefaroni and chilli over the portable gas stove. We slept in the tent and heard owls and coyotes through the night.
I wanted to sleep with my CPAP (an apparatus that prevents sleep apnea) but without power it won’t work. I thought I had been clever by buying a portable power supply, but I underestimated how much power the pump in the CPAP uses and it stopped working around 2:30AM.
We headed to the race site, with me having slept less than 5 hours. The Dynamic Events crew run a very structured race, with strict rules and timing about accessing the transition area prior to the race. I was tugging on my wetsuit, I overheard some other athletes talk about their timing chip ankle strap and realized I had forgotten to pick mine up. I grabbed it and was helped to get my wetsuit on by a good Samaritan.
I was in the first wave and luckily the water didn’t feel particularly cold. Swimming was the event I was best trained for, yet somehow I still struggled. I kept a good easy pace at the beginning, but a nagging cough kept me from having regular breathing – I even ended up drinking some of the lake water. At one point I looked at the sky and saw a drone – I wonder if that footage will turn up somewhere. At 22:53, I exited the water.
I still felt gassed so I walked to my transition. It took me forever to get my wetsuit off – I couldn’t pull it down off my ankles. I began contemplating whether I needed to invest more time in Yoga to be able to accomplish the feat. I walked the bike out of transition.
On the bike, I thought I was happy with my pace, but I did notice myself getting passed by people who might have been first-timers; fit ones, mind you. My hat’s off to anyone trying this course with a commuter or mountain bike, especially if you can climb those hills without huffing and puffing, like some riders I observed.
The bike course took us right into the touristy downtown of Yarrow, then doubled back on itself. I witnessed a near collision between a left-hand turning car and some racers – I’m not sure how the volunteer with the ‘SLOW/STOP’ sign could have done better to communicate to the driver. Luckily no one was hurt.
Heading back to the race site meant a big climb that took a lot out of me, so between that and being rusty, I dismounted a bit after the official line. Luckily I came in so slowly and safely that the race official called it ‘close enough’ and let me on my way without a penalty. I took my time getting my shoes on before heading out on the lovely lakeside run.
As I commented last year, the run course is gorgeous. One racer asked me as we looked at the houses on the shore “Can you imagine living here?” I smirked because there’s no reason one of the homeowners couldn’t participate in the triathlon (in fact, they’d have free parking!) so how did she know I didn’t live there?
The run course has multiple turn-around points and when I hit the first one, I wanted to imagine that it meant I was halfway done. That would turn into lamenting that I was on the “longest 5k ever”, which was echoed back to me by other racers.
I crossed the finish line well over the 2 hours I had predicted, and almost 30 minutes slower than last year. I promised myself to merely focus on finishing (complete, not compete) but that’s hard to do when you know better results are in your history and hopefully, your future.
I loved the idea of combining a family camping trip with a race weekend, but it made for a lot of work prepping, stress over mistakes, and poor rest before the race. Still, it was, as always, an adventure.
Hiking is one of our favourite things to do as a family. Whether at home in the suburbs of Mississauga, in Muskoka, or on vacations, it’s something we can all enjoy regardless of the length of our legs and doesn’t take much extra planning or equipment when we keep the hikes reasonably short. Given BC’s legendary beauty, we knew we’d find some extraordinary places to hike. Here are some of the ones we’ve enjoyed so far
Golden Ears
This was the first provincial park we tried once we had settled in. We go over the beautiful Golden Ears bridge (which shows off statues of Golden Eagles, and I once saw a real one perched on a pole too) and through Maple Ridge.
A park of this size always has more trails than you can hope to completely discover, but the Spirea trail was good for our moms who have some mobility issues. The Mike Lake trail was a little more challenging, terrain-wise. I love the moss-covered vegetation, which makes the whole forest look enchanted, especially when the light comes through.
Othello Tunnels
We made it out to this unique attraction a week before the floods would have made the routes to Hope, BC unuseable. In fact, as of this writing, the Coquihalla Canyon Provincial Park which encompasses the Othello Tunnels is still closed. The tunnels were created to support rail transport of crude ore from mines in the area. Kids love tunnels, and the trail is flat and easy to walk or even ride a bike along. It goes along the Nicolum river and the views are gorgeous. It’s an out and back, and we didn’t complete it but you can keep your hike under 3km and see all the tunnels.
Rolley Lake
Rolley Lake Provincial Park
https://www.instagram.com/p/CVb2rIaLprc/
This park gave us Ontarians a glimpse of how big the BC trees (and their leaves) can get. It’s always nice to walk along a shoreline – this is a pretty lake that I nearly took a cold-water swim in.
Honourable Mention: Abbotsford (Discovery Walk and More)
The best places to walk are in your own backyard (I have it on my to-do list to write an ‘Ode to the Suburbs’ post, stay tuned). Abbotsford has a network of trails called the Discovery Walk, and on our first outing (on bikes) we saw a pair of Beavers before we had gotten more than 100 feet from the car. The trail network pretty much spans the town from East to West and comprises nearly 30km of mixed use paths traversing forests, wetlands, and meadows.
Some of the bodies of water that have dedicated parks in Abbotsford are the Mill Lake park, which is a beautiful spot for a bike ride, and the Albert Dyck Memorial park – a former quarry which hosts a waterski club and a swimming area. If I can get myself together enough, I might try a cold water swim there.
Whenever I’m in a new place, I try to discover what kinds of recreational opportunities are around. Back in September, I was in the parking lot of Shark Boy’s gymnastics club, when I noticed terrain of a unique nature. It was a BMX park, with bumps and curved embankments forming a course that is completed in a single lap, although it twists and folds back upon itself rather than just being a circle.
My birthday happened to fall on a Sunday, so the Lightning Kid and I decided to give it a go, while Shark Boy was at his gymnastics training. For the footage, we’ll have to consult the Lightning Kid YouTube Channel:
I was on my hardtail mountain bike, which is not quite ideal for jumps and such on this track, or maybe that’s my lack of confidence talking. We did go back once, and I wore clip-in shoes rather than the trail runners you see me in during the video. We also got a chance to witness a race to end the season and see how it’s really done, with a mechanical gate to keep the starting line honest, found at a top of a ramp by the start of the course. A rep from the Abbotsford BMX club told us they would transition to indoors, and how welcoming they were to beginners.
Unfortunately, it took us a while to get back to them, and by the time we did, the Lightning Kid had lost all the confidence and ended up walking his bike around the ‘half-track’ which is the latter segment of the indoor course with smaller bumps. Shark Boy tried the whole racecourse but found his mountain bike wasn’t well suited to the racing gate, as he couldn’t sit in the seat and stay balanced while waiting for the gate to drop. He got to try a loaner BMX bike, but he hated how low the seat was – BMX riders typically stand on the pedals for the entire ride, and absorb the bumps by bending their knees and elbows. Shark Boy seemed to be doing well adapting to the bike and a new style of riding, but apparently he hated every second of it. I thought that would be the end of our foray into this sport, but apparently, the Lightning Kid was adamant about coming back.
On your first visit, you can get a 1 day BMX membership for liability reasons, but subsequent visits mean an annual membership. I have to admit I didn’t want to spring for one just to watch him walk his bike, but thanks to some great coaching by the staff at Abbotsford BMX, he got to ride the half-track the very next visit! Looks like I’ll be investing in the official protective gear (gloves, helmet with face covering, etc) for him, but I’m not sure if it’s something I will take up myself.
This post is another throwback to coping with the pandemic and lockdown. Ontario had nothing going on in terms of camps or activities, or at least not when you could plan for the summer, and the kids were long overdue for someadventure, and the adults needed their alone-time.
We had researched FlipFest and its sister event NinjaFest; a competitive gymnastics, and obstacle course/ninja warrior camp respectively, that are held in Crossville, Tennessee. We enrolled the kids for mid-July and plotted how to get there. The land border was closed into the US, while flights back into Canada had their passengers diverted into Quarantine hotels (which could only serve to help spread the virus by concentrating at-risk travellers into small spaces), so the workaround was to fly there and drive back.
The Drive Down
My car was shipped across the border from Niagara Falls, Canada to Niagara, NY, and we flew on 2 helicopters to meet it.
Each flight was only 7-8 minutes long, but the chopper could only seat 3, so we needed 2 flights. The car left on a truck ahead of our scheduled flights. After clearing customs, we hopped into the car and drove till we got hungry in Erie, PA, and had some pizza for lunch.
Then we drove on to Cleveland West- I booked mostly Holiday Inn Express and Suites on this trip since I’m an IHG rewards member. Unfortunately, the pool at this hotel was under repair/maintenance of some kind, so there was no fun reward for the kids being patient in the car. Instead, we found a SkyZone Trampoline Park. We found a nice Italian restaurant in a shopping village.
From the Lightning Kid YouTube Channel
On Day 2, we made our way to Lexington, KY. Our timetable getting to Tennessee was not an aggressive one, because none of us were sure how well we’d fare with the long drive. I’d made it to Kentucky in a day on a road trip in my twenties, but travelling with a family (never mind one that is recovering from lockdown blues) is obviously different. Before hitting the road, the Lightning Kid and I did a little geocaching – whenever there’s time and we’re in an unfamiliar area, it’s worth checking if there’s anything nearby to be found.
After some driving, we decided to try our first Chick-Fil-A at Columbus’ Polaris Fashion Mall food court. I’ve got to say, their chicken sandwiches were overhyped – I don’t think we’ve been missing that much in Canada. On the other hand, we gorged ourselves at a Cheesecake Factory once we reached Lexington.
The third day was the 4th of July. We tried Sonic and their killer milkshakes for lunch en route. We had We got a Holiday Inn in Newport, TN, and went to see the sequel to Boss Baby (Boss Baby: Back in Business) in a theatre – in Ontario, they still weren’t open. We had dinner at a Cracker Barrel and tried Okra for the first time while trying to distinguish between Chicken Fried and Country Fried – if we figured it out, I’ve since forgotten it. Once it got dark, we were able to see a few fireworks from the hotel windows.
Tennesee Family Time
Having arrived in Tennessee, we stayed at a ‘Glamping’ Camp Resort, and our first night was spent in a Treehouse!
We spent the day in a fairly relaxed manner, swimming in the pool, playing Cornhole, as well as eating Barbecue and ice cream. We took some time to check out Gatlinburg, which is quite the tourist trap – I had the verse from Johnny Cash’s ‘Boy Named Sue’ running through my head: It was Gatlinburg, in mid-July, and I’d just hit town, and my throat was dry… I thought I’d grab myself a brew… We drove up to Ober, which was just closing, so we didn’t get to try much in terms of activities. In winter it’s a ski resort, which kind of blows my mind that people can ski in Tennessee. We slept well in that treehouse and were sad to have to leave it.
The next day we used the Gatlinburg Trolley Service to go into town and had a long wait in line to ride a chairlift to the top of Anakeesta, a local theme park.
We were highly unused to crowds at this stage, and since standing in crowded lines is part of any theme park day, we were a little unnerved and unable to fully enjoy the experience. It was a hot day, and the Lightning Kid took to a splash pad we found near the top after lunch. He and I were going to take a coaster ride, but the wait times were too long. The kids did enjoy a cat-walk play area, but I didn’t get pictures. Still, it was a great view of the Smokey’s and we opted for a bus ride back down to the bottom.
Once we got back to the Campground we had to check out our Safari Tent, thankfully it had a portable air-conditioner as the canvas walls weren’t breathable and the summer heat was on!
We were in this Safari tent for two nights. The second day was spent with more swimming, Cornhole, and searching for breakfast. We grilled sausages by the fire for dinner. We really enjoyed the community feel of our campsite, and it was so nice watching the boys make friends.
The next day we checked in at another campsite, this time in a cabin. The Jellystone Park in Pigeon Forge. Pigeon Forge is Dolly Parton’s hometown and where Dollywood is found. We didn’t make it there; as we were still a bit wary of crowds (and expenses) from being tourists in Gatlinburg, but I’d encourage anyone and everyone to look into Dolly Parton’s biography because she is fascinating.
The Jellystone campground had a fun jump pad/ trampoline that the boys got to use to warm up their skills prior to their sleepaway camp (which was the purpose of this trip).
Our final destination as a a family of four was Crossville TN. Checking your kids in to their first sleepaway camp can be a little nerve-wracking. Shark Boy did a couple of overnights with Beaver Scouts, and sometimes at a friend’s or grandparent’s place. The Lightning Kid had only done overnight Beaver Scout camps with me as a leader. They were both anxious, and so were we leading up to it, but the check-in process at Flipfest was so encouraging and we were so happy to see our kids be able to interact with peers again that there were plenty of smiles (brave smiles, but smiles all the same) around.
My wife and I headed back to our hotel in Crossville with nothing to do but enjoy the peace and quiet. For about an hour, when we got a call from the camp! We were terrified that the Lightning Kid was not fitting in somehow – the fear of the special needs parent, or at least, fear #437 – but it ended up that Shark Boy had twisted his ankle. We spoke to the camp director and we came to the consensus that we wanted to wait and see with some icing, rather than rush to a hospital. In the end it ended up being the right move, since he was training at full capacity within a couple of days, having taken one day to treat the ankle lightly.
After that, we were able to have a couples weekend (which actually took place on a Monday/Tuesday) in Nashville. We stayed in a beautiful hotel called the Bobby. Unfortunately not every amenity was in full swing (e.g. rooftop pool, rooftop bar weren’t operational during the week.
Our first night in Nashville made it hard to find the barbecue that Tennessee is famous for – the line-ups and crowds were a bit much for us. It was exciting to hear live music come out of every bar though.
We had better luck the next day and reserved at Puckett’s Grocery Store early. We spent part of our afternoon at the Johnny Cash Museum. Some of my favourite parts were listening to all the great artists that have covered the Man in Black over the years (did you know Miley Cyrus did a live cover of A Boy Named Sue?). We’d been listening to Johnny Cash a fair bit on the drive down as a Tennesse music primer. Seeing him act in some TV shows and movies was a hoot too (he seemed to like to play the villain).
At Puckett’s, I tried a flight of Tennessee whiskeys and I’ve been on the lookout for a bottle of George Dickel‘s ever since. There was great BBQ, and live music from an artist named Troy Kemp managed to stoke an appreciation for country music in this heart of mine.
The next day, we left the urban environment of Nashville behind (though hopefully not for the last time) for a bed and breakfast in a more picturesque area, and not so far from the Flipfest camp (just in case). The Garden Inn Bed and Breakfast had a nearby trail with some nice lookouts (especially the aptly named Bee rock – the large bees kind of scared us off extending a sunset walk beyond a certain point).
We were able to do some nice hiking by Falls Creek Falls State Park. I actually used the waterfalls themselves to cool off after a tough, hot hike down. We added a little more walking and tried the suspension bridge with some trepidation.
Another day went by and suddenly we were picking the boys up from camp. They had a wonderful time, apparently their favourite part was the ‘Blob’ – a giant inflated pad which launches one kid up and into the lake when another kid drops onto it from a height. They had campfires, dance nights, and loads of other fun, and they’ll be begging us to go back next summer, I’m sure.
The drive back was through Lexington and we stopped in Cincinatti. From there to Detroit and across the border thanks to the negative PCR test results we got from a CVS in Crossville. We got home and spent 2 weeks quarantining which was difficult, but probably worth it in the long run.
It’s been a while since I posted anything, and while I suspect a blog like mine is rapidly becoming a type of dinosaur. This article (“Why it’s time to stop worrying about your children’s screen time during COVID-19” ) moved me to put some of my thoughts down – even if they might still be a bit scattered.
It isn’t time to stop worrying about screen time; but then, it was never time to ‘start worrying’ – worry implies anxious thinking rather than taking action. Screen time has become somewhat of a necessity during the pandemic, but that doesn’t mean its documented effects are gone, and their impacts are probably more important than before. Screen time can affect sleep quality, and high sleep quality is probably the best defence against mental illness, including anxiety and depression, which are both at high levels in pandemic times. For reference, as of this writing, where I live, the Canadian province of Ontario, is in a State of Emergency, which is distinct from a Lockdown in… ways that aren’t necessarily all that clear to me. Suffice it to say there are no indoor places to go (libraries, gyms, extracurricular activities, schools) and outdoor ones are limited by capacity and pre-booking.
Not All Screen Time is Equal
The biggest takeaway from the article I linked at the beginning is that simply measuring screen time is an extremely coarse way to look at the problem. The kids are in front of their screens for school, so taking that away would simply be depriving them of an education, so that’s what I’ll call the first tier of screen time, and has the lowest ratio of risk to reward. I’ll break down some other categories as I see them.
Zoom/Other Video Conferencing for Extracurricular Activities: Shark Boy is trying to stay in competitive gymnast shape through Zoom sessions. He does not really like it. We do have some mats and equipment that lets him practice some techniques, but mostly it comes down to grueling conditioning exercises. He’s 11 years old, and I have to hope that somewhere in that developing pre-teen brain there is the understanding of cause and effect, and the knowledge that conditioning is necessary to keep a body capable of doing the ‘fun stuff’ of flipping and twisting, etc. When restrictions were a little lighter, the Lightning Kid (age 9) started Karate and a local dojo and was really thriving with it. He’s got a great passion for all things ‘Ninja’ and for a while I had him signed up with an online ‘Ninja’ program run by one of his favourite YouTube Channels (more on YouTube in a bit) – but I prefer that our money goes to an accredited Black Belt in our community. Unfortunately, the Lightning Kid does not enjoy online Karate and has not attended classes recently. They both do German School on Saturdays over Zoom. We are also considering piano lessons in a virtual (or partially virtual, if possible) format.
Movies/Television: Watching a movie or show as a family basically counts as quality time in my book, but it’s still screen time. Going on a walk/hike, skiing, swimming would all be better – but at least the communal nature of watching together (whether it’s all four of us, as siblings, or one parent one child) still makes for some bonding. I’ve also noticed from a sleep hygiene perspective that big screens from a distance interfere less with my personal sleep quality than small screens like phones/ tablets.
YouTube: I feel like an old man saying it, but I think I hate YouTube. The kids will watch hours of it, but when I try to put on a DVD of a classic family movie (‘The Iron Giant’) to save our bandwidth while my wife tried to have a high-priority Zoom call, they got bored in 20 minutes. Apparently, the appeal of a narrative structure that was worked on by hundreds of professionals can’t compete with Millenials yelling at the top of their lungs (because it’s the only way they know how to make their content dramatic and exciting). Obviously, not everything on YouTube is bad, and I can’t detract from families and individuals who have achieved financial independence (or even outright wealth) through their content creation. It’s just that even when we monitor and restrict content to ‘family-friendly’ stuff, what they can put out there should still come with a ‘Don’t Try This At Home’ disclaimer. Pranking your parents, hiding important items, and of course, yelling and screaming are all unwanted incidents that have invaded our home through YouTube…. but don’t forget to Like and Subscribe to the Lightning Kid channel 😉
Social Media: Our kids don’t have accounts on any platform (except the aforementioned YouTube and Facebook Messenger), but they can be affected by their parents’ consumption of misinformation, or simply the anxiety response provocation of a lot of what is found on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. Once we mention something alarmist out loud within earshot of the kids, you can’t put the genie back in the bottle. While I believe in tackling issues with open communication, even with children, the pandemic has provided a non-stop stream of questions with no easy answers, and our kids have to cope with too much ambiguity already. We have to try to filter some of that unknown and unknowable from ourselves, and if not that, from ourselves.
Video Games: Ah, the great evil of electronic media. While I think a hyper-realistic game like Call of Duty should be off-limits to all children except perhaps near-adults, and there is no Fortnite in our house, Shark Boy has been playing an online shooter that uses *eggs* with school friends as well as the incredibly popular ‘Among Us’. We have the strictest regimen for these – only with known friends, generally about an hour a week, only by appointment. I’ve been personally enjoying a fantasy RPG (Elder Scrolls IV: Oblvion) – which isn’t online and can be paused and saved at the drop of a hat in case I need to help chop vegetables or whatever else needs doing. I don’t recommend video games in the later evening for adults or children, as I think they are over-stimulating close to bedtime.
Structure/Obligations
When school was still in-person, we kept a morning checklist to keep the kids task-oriented and on time for school. It used to irk me that after years of doing it, we still need to order the kids and keep a written record of basics like ‘Eat Breakfast’ and ‘Brush Your Teeth’, but when the alternative is yelling and/or repeating oneself ad nauseam, you make your peace with the whiteboard. We’ve actually expanded the whiteboard checklist to include ‘Eat Lunch’ and ‘Outside Time’. Our kids also have some light chores like emptying the dishwasher, taking out the recycling, and putting away their laundry. I know some families are more hard-core about chores, and some don’t have their kids do chores at all. While the long term developmental benefits of having kids help around the house are good, my view is a little more self-serving and pragmatic when it comes to this. As parents, we already have the following duties:
Teaching Assistants: While school is online, teachers can’t do things like look over their shoulders to make sure the work is being done properly, ensure students get to class on-time, hand out worksheets, or console students during a meltdown (at least not physically). That’s us, the parents filling that role.
Housekeeping: Not every household had access to outsourcing these duties before the pandemic, but right now, I would guess the average household has seen an increase in how much they have to do housework – there’s simply more traffic in the house now that we don’t go to the office or school.
Playmates/Babysitting: I honestly don’t know how parents of only children do it. When our kids aren’t on screen, they do play with one another, at least until something escalates and parental intervention is needed. When we’re not breaking up fights, we also act as entertainment/clowns/whatever (see the Lead By Example section)
Job: That thing you do to pay the Internet bills.
With all that going on, the kids have to pick up some of the slack. In addition to homework, we’ll ask whether the chores are done as a way to interrupt or mitigate the total screentime.
Tell Don’t Ask
Did I say ask in the last sentence? I did not mean ask, because that doesn’t work as a means to interrupt the siren song of the screen. In my experience, you have to be willing to traverse the house to the child and physically disable the device or confiscate the remote, etc. I also have an app for each TV that acts as a remote so I can over-ride the screen. Our service provider provides an app that can monitor and control the Internet. I’ve put devices into different profiles including ‘TV’ and ‘School Tools’ which get controlled differently (rather than simply killing the Wifi entirely which could impact the adults’ ability to do their jobs). The TV profile gets disabled from 6 to 8:30 so the kids focus on being ready for school according to our whiteboard checklist and has an overall usage time limit. It seems like that time limit does not get enforced by the app restricting those devices after the time limit is reached, but at least I get notified and can take manual action.
Lead By Example
My phone has apps to control my kids’ screen-time, to monitor their school work. I check the weather on my phone to know how the kids have to dress for outdoor time. There are times when we are between obligations like meetings or preparing meals where we might look at social media as a means to pass the time that we can’t spend on something more constructive because the next obligation might come rushing around the corner. Let’s face it though, there are times we are straight-up doom-scrolling, and it would be better to put the screen away.
Every time we’ve gotten outside for a walk, hike, or anything, there’s been plenty of resistance, yet once we’re out the door, the boys start to play with each other exactly how you imagine kids should. Tag, maybe some roughhousing, running, jumping, climbing, and so on. I compare them to animals with a great deal of reluctance, but they resemble dogs off the leash so closely, I can’t think of any other comparison. I pointed out to them once that the way they were playing on our walk could just as easily be done in our backyard at any time. They just shrugged, because they’d never have come up with that on their own until we freed them from the lure of the screen.
Kids vary in their temperament, and we’ve been smart/lucky enough to have made getting outside a priority since our kids were babies, but I often think of this scene from the generally terrible movie, This is 40.
The problem here is that the parents try to quit electronics cold-turkey and force the kids to play outside in ways they’ve never been shown how to, and there’s very little evidence that they participated in the kinds of activities they suggested at any point. In the movie, Paul Rudd’s character was a cycling enthusiast and Leslie Mann had put in a lot of work with a personal trainer, but that doesn’t translate to their kids. What they needed to do was start getting their own hands dirty ‘playing with sticks’ themselves to engage the kids with the activity and model how it’s done. I don’t know how to make lettuce more appealing though.
We have some indoor activities too. While board games, yoga, and bedroom basketball can demand time from us as parents that is already in short supply, I think it does pay dividends in that they see there is more to life than screens even in quarantine. Sometimes they continue the games independently for a few minutes after the parents have left.
I’ll close out with a story of how the screen has actually inspired a non-electronic form of fun. The aforementioned ‘Among Us’ is basically a murder mystery where the players perform tasks around a space station while an Impostor lurks ‘among us’. We’ve created a ‘real-life’ version where little cards are drawn at random. The tasks are even geared toward cleaning up the house a little (though I’d caution against putting full-blown chores on the task list). The game needs at least 3 people, but 4 is better for making the logic and intrigue more fun and challenging.
What do you think? How hard should the limits on screen time be? Should there be flexibility depending on what kind of day it is, or does that lead to a slippery slope? Would you like to know more about ‘Real-Life Among Us’?
This trip occurred in late April 2018. I am posting the unfinished draft, with the knowledge that I’ll never finish it, and my memory of missing details isn’t good enough to fill them in. Stay tuned for a post about our 2019-2020 Cruise of the Hawaiian Islands.
In my head, my ideal vacation involves adventure of some kind, like trekking through a rain forest, or surfing, but in reality, what a vacation destination is something to keep the kids out of adult hair for a portion of the day, which is how we ended up in all-inclusive resorts like the ones we visited in Jamaica, Mexico and Turks & Caicos. If we can get the kids looked after and they don’t pull faces as a result, we generally call it a win. The evolution of this trend was to go on a Disney Cruise – especially while our kids are young enough to get more out of character experiences. So the decision was made.
Disney as a sub-culture is something that scares me frankly. We joined a Facebook group that was devoted not to Disney, Disney Cruises, or our specific cruise route, but our actual cruise dates, and it was one of the busiest FB groups I have ever been a member of, which means too many notifications (until you turn them off) and way too much hype. I’m not a big fan of overscheduling or “over-researching” vacations – I feel that it leads to second-guessing yourself and your decision and creates anxiety. I don’t want to knock those that want to squeeze every last drop out of their vacation experience, it’s just that it’s antithetical to the kick-back-and-relax vibe I want running through my own vacation experience. So I won’t break down all the craziness that seems to be part of this cult and I’ll stick to what we did, and what we experienced and what we learned.
Getting to and on the ship was quite painless; in the Orlando airport, there are Disney signs everywhere, and as long as you know that you’re going on a cruise as opposed to Disney World amusement park, you’ll end up on the right bus. The staff are highly organized and friendly – this would become a theme throughout the trip. We had our essentials packed in a daypack, since we knew our luggage would not be accessible till later, and wanted to get changed into swim gear and start enjoying the facilities. Unfortunately, we took enough time getting oriented, including a tour of the kids’ club (known as the Oceaneer Club and Oceaneer Lab) that by the time we got to the pool deck, they had temporarily closed the pools. Cue tantrums from over-tired kids. We knew the first day and transition would be a taxing adjustment. I think we did get settled into the onboard routine fairly well.
We had a late dining rotation (8:15PM, when the kids’ nominal bedtime is 7:30), that concerned us, but ultimately we got through our meals well and the kids were good and ready for bed. Speaking of bed here was my first unexpected fact of cruise life:
1.) You sleep like a baby on a cruise ship. We had fairly rough seas but the rocking of the boat and the sound-proofing of the stateroom really enhanced the ‘getting-away-from-it-all’ isolation and peacefulness.
The assigned dining rotation kept us with the same server and same table-mates every night. Our server Jaithip (from Thailand) was wonderful – she learned the boys’ favourite drinks and had them ready by the time we sat down every night. One time I wanted to order a lobster pasta and she steered me away from it. I was a little irked because I figured I know what I like, but she brought me a small sample of the pasta alongside the alternate main course I ordered. She was right – the pasta was garbage. Now having said that, the food varied from good (the fast food on the pool deck) to very good (in the dining rooms) to excellent (in the paid restaurants).
The Lightning Kid with Mickey Waffles
Our table mates were a nice family that was celebrating their 10th wedding anniversary (as we will be in July) with blond boys aged 8 and 5 (to our 8 and 6), and enjoy running and triathlon. Thus was born our theory that Disney is spying on us at a level that would make Mark Zuckerberg blush. It can’t be a coincidence that Mickey Mouse’s sign-off is “See ya real soon!”…
On our second day, we got to access the pools. The kids really like just hanging around in the water, and they have movies playing on the big screen all the time so even when they aren’t splashing around, they can just hang out and watch the screen. I liked that the lifeguards would periodically clear everyone out of the pool for about 10 minutes at a time; it gave parents a chance to apply sunscreen to the kids or take them to the washrooms, or any other needed transition and we got to blame the staff/rules rather than be the bad guys ourselves. There were splash pads (which I confess I used to wash melted ice-cream off of faces and chests) and a small warm-water pool that was flush with a window overlooking the ocean (a surreal view), the “Mickey” slide was useable for 4 year-olds and up (but no adults), but the ‘Aquaduck’ was the biggest and boldest water slide. It actually hangs out over the edge of the ship and has some tunnels with lights, open-air sections, ups and downs, and generally traverses the entire perimeter of the ship. The Lightning Kid was too small to go on it, and Shark Boy needed some-one 16 or over to accompany him on one of the 2 seated dinghies – usually my wife or myself, but on at least one occasion he managed to rope the older sister of a friend he made into the job. The problem with the Aquaduck (beyond long line-ups) was it would be closed in high winds, which we had plenty of. Speaking of wind and weather, we did have some rough seas, and though I can’t say I got seasick really, it leads to unexpected fact #2:
2.) Seasickness is like being drunk. I’ve been seasick only once in my life (a tall-ship cruise on Lake Ontario – think pirate ship), and that was from continuous rocking. The rocks on this voyage came fairly unexpectedly – not a constant rhythm – and I’d sway this way or that as if I’d had too much to drink. At first, I thought it might make me throw up, but it was more like a flashback to having had that much to drink and expecting the next most obvious result than actual nausea. Once I realized that, I was pretty much out of the woods. I had some landsickness for a few days after returning.
Pool Deck with the Aquaduck water slide
The pools were a little disappointing from an adult perspective. The kids’ pools were too packed for an adult to swim, and in fact the only pool deeper than waist height was the ‘Donald’ pool right in front of the screen, and of course, that pool was the most full at any given time, which meant getting kicked and swum over by children. There is an adults-only area, but the pools there are also about waist height only – though there is a swim-up bar.
When we wanted to get away from the pool and not have to worry about what the kids were getting up to, we took them to the Oceaneer’s Club/Lab. This is two halves of their kids’ club; from what I could gather the lab had more autonomous time while the club had more structured activity – Shark Boy preferred the lab. There were various alcoves that had different kinds of activities and themes like crafts, or superheroes, and computer terminals and tablets and screens for movies. In some way I was hesitant about all the screen time, but between the pool deck and our excursions, the kids were probably getting enough activity and fresh air. There was even a floor of screens that could run games, straddling the line between screens and physical activity.
My kids seem to prefer free unstructured play to organized, scheduled activities, and this seemed to hold up in the time they spent in the kids’ club. Still, we tried to find special activities onboard that we could book in advance. One of these was the Royal Knight package which is like a Princess make-over for boys (traditional gender roles – whaddyagonnado?). While I can neither confirm nor deny the existence of a photo of the Lightning Kid in an Elsa (from Frozen) gown and wig, I will say that I wouldn’t consider my sons to be good candidates for make-over type activities like you find in the Bibbity Bobbity Boutique. Yet the ‘fairy godmothers’ did such a great job staying in character and selling the whole concept (the hair gel was ‘dragon snot’ that would keep dragons from being able to smell the princes), and of course, the sword and shield part of the costume was very well received by the boys.
Live shows are something that everyone raves about – I believe the Aladdin one was specifically recommended by everyone we spoke to. We only made it to one, and that one took place on the pool deck rather than the indoor theatres. Still, it was a fun spectacle with song and dance, Mickey, Goofy, Captain Hook and Smee as well as one stunt involving a rappel down the ship’s chimney stack! It was part of a whole pirate theme night that everyone dressed up for – our room was provided with bandanas, but I had packed some with eye-patches and ear-rings.
I should mention that I did go to the theatres to watch a couple of movies: I saw Black Panther once alone, then deemed it OK for Shark Boy to watch and saw it again with him. I also got to see Avengers Infinity War on its opening weekend without standing in line! It was too intense for younger kids, in my opinion.
We had 3 port stops, the first on the Dutch side of St. Maarten. We were booked into a catamaran cruise with snorkelling and a beach visit. We disembarked in Phillipsburg and with an hour or so before the Catamaran was leaving got a chance to get in the water a little bit, which I thought was a good opportunity to test out some full face mask snorkels that we had gotten at the Cottage Life show.
While they worked well initially, it seems like Shark Boy struggled with his when it came time to snorkel from the catamaran at a wreck site. I was dealing with the Lightning Kid and I hadn’t gotten a proper life vest for him; the normal vests that they hand out for snorkelling provide some floatation when inflated, but aren’t rated for non-swimmers. In the ensuing chaos, nobody could really enjoy themselves and from what I could tell there was poor visibility anyway. Luckily, the beach visit afterwards was a lot more pleasant and relaxed.
Our second port stop was in St. Thomas, US Virgin Islands. I went scuba diving at a wreck site that had a sordid history of drug smuggling, and the sunken ship being moved by human action and hurricanes. I got within 5 feet of a sea turtle, and saw stingrays that were at least 5 feet in diameter.
After missing the Albion Hills event in July, and no events in August, everyone was glad to see the return of 5 Peaks to the Heart Lake Conservation Area in September. And what a September! The summer heat came in late, and everyone needed to prepare.
The kids 3k timed race starts first. As a ‘Trail Crew Leader’ and slowpoke, it made sense for me to bring up the rear in case of stragglers.  I spoke with another volunteer who helped sweep and learned that not only was the race centred around a different site within the park but naturally the course had been altered from previous years. That meant my favourite hill, which I always climbed like Spider-Man wouldn’t be there. Oh well, the heat would make it plenty challenging.
Dig the hat.
Photo courtesy of Sue Sitki Photography
The Kids course was an out and back, and I encountered Shark Boy a little later than I expected. He had the company of one of our Trail Crew Leaders, and I found out later that there were tears at the finish line due to an encroaching headache. It seems his late nights in competitive gymnastics catch up with him. A little more water and he was good to help his brother in the 1k fun run.
The Lightning Kid has been getting faster and faster on his feet but he also likes to use those feet to dance with Buffy.
As I had mentioned, Shark Boy got his second wind and wanted to keep his brother company. The Lightning Kid didn’t mind a big brother chaperone but dismissed his mother from the job. Apparently, he took a little spill but the community spirit at 5 Peaks is always huge, and he ended up picking up an adult guardian anyway.
For my part, the new Sport Course provided lots of shade, so I didn’t feel the heat too badly, and there were some nice views of Heart Lake along the way. I’m pretty proud of the cruising pace I maintained, though I forgot to stop my Endomondo app for tracking. My paces varied between 6:20/km to 7:16/km.
Courtesy of Sue Sitki Photography
The final race of the season is at the Kortright Conservation Area on October 28th. If you live in the area, consider signing yourself, your friends and your little ones up! Use the code ‘IRONROGUE’ when registering.
Since I last posted, we’ve been in two 5 Peaks trail runs, and two kids’ triathlons. Rather than try to catch up with 4 distinct race recaps, I thought I’d pair them up by race type – that means you’re going to get an overview of the kids’ triathlons we’ve been involved in this time, and the 5 Peaks races next time.
Furthermore, I’m going to combine observations from both races on a per kid basis; they’re only 2 years apart, but in triathlon, their experiences are very, very different in terms of what the event expects of them, and what they expect of the event. The races were the C3 Kinetico Kids of Steel and Nicola’s Triathlon (for MFM Research).
The Lightning Kid
Swim
The Lightning Kid is currently at the ‘Crocodile’ level in his swimming lessons; that means they’re teaching him to roll from back to front, and combining the front crawl arm stroke into the motion. He makes forward progress for a bit, but he’s not really staying afloat or getting his head above water to breathe more than once, so for a triathlon he wears a life jacket (at the C3 Kinetico Kids of Steel) or water-wings (at Nicola’s tri) and I get in the water with him to coach and cheer. For the C3 Kinetico KOS, it was 1 length of the pool for the 6-7 age group (groups are determined by the age on Dec 31st). It would have been 2 lengths for Nicola’s Tri, but we asked them to bump him down to the lower age group, which aligns better with his physical size anyway. At both events, he kicked and doggy paddled gamely, and was only slowed down by his need to take in the scenery and ham it up for the crowd – as usual. I stayed a couple of meters ahead of him and tried to keep his eyes on the prize – or at least the end of the pool lane.
I heard reports that some parents were pushing or pulling their kids through the water, and obviously I’m not going to get bent out of shape about it at a young age like this, but I will say the point of these events is endurance and that getting the job done (i.e. making it to the end) is the bigger goal, not how fast you complete it. I’d rather have my sons come in last, having earned every inch of the achievement themselves – who knew I was so hardcore about this stuff?
Nicola’s Tri took place 2 weeks after the C3 Kinetico KOS and I was blown away about how the Lightning Kid took to transition, running out of the pool area along the red carpet to his bike like a kid possessed.
Bike
While we have been getting him to practice on a pedal bike without training wheels, we haven’t been brave enough to let go of the handle yet, especially since he seems to steer pretty erratically, and we figured he’d be freaked out during the race if he had a fall shortly before the big day, so we selected the balance bike for both races. And yes – it’s pink. The bike leg has a lot of the same Lightning Kid hallmarks, good speed, big smile, hamming it up for the crowd. Unlike adult races, I think the kids’ events could stand to have longer bike legs – if only because I think it would favour my kids (while longer bike legs in adult races only penalize me and my lack of bike fitness). They were both basically a lap around the parking lot with me running alongside.
I do help the Lightning Kid put on socks and shoes which is extra challenging with wet feet; he did not want to forgo socks, in spite of my advice.  I have to get my own shoes on during transition too so that I can run alongside (or ahead) and cheer and coach (again as usual).
Run
The Lightning Kid has improved his running the most in the last year – it surprises most people.  He’s also gotten familiar enough with triathlon that he knows when you get off the bike the race is nearly done and he gets what Germans call Endspurt – a final burst of speed to finish the race.  With only about 500 m to run, it’s over so fast, it’s hard for my wife to get caught up and grab a picture.  The best we can do for pictures is the finish line.
Shark Boy
Swim
Every year, the swim length seems to double for Shark Boy.  We knew he’d have to manage 100 m this year, so we took to the pool for the 4-5 weeks before the race (on weekends) and tried to increase his skill and endurance.  Every week, he’d have to pass the swim test of 2 pool widths before venturing into the deep end for more practice.  I drilled him in breast stroke, as I feel it’s  a more endurance paced stroke; make no mistake, front crawl/freestyle is faster once you can manage it in a sustainable pace, but plenty of people starting out seem to prefer it, and I know it’s the stroke of choice for recreational swimming in Europe.  Too bad some lifeguards here don’t seem to feel it’s a valid way to swim – I had one lifeguard arbitrarily try to say he hadn’t passed the 2 width swim test for using breast stroke where his face wasn’t in the water enough, and during the Nicola’s tri he was forced to use a flutter board, which slowed him down more.  I know I have to defer to a trained volunteer when it comes to safety, but I do feel there is a bias there.
Being the slowest in his wave (though not the slowest swimmer in his age group, from what I could see) discouraged Shark Boy, even though I tried to explain before and after the race that the overall time is what counted, not when you crossed the finish line (he was in the last wave of the Kinetico Kids Of Steel). Â I’m proud of his swims regardless, because through hard work, we took him from not being unable to finish 100 m of swimming to more than capable.
Bike
Shark Boy has gotten a hand-me-down mountain bike that has gears in anticipation of a bike camp he’ll be participating in this summer, but though he’s been warming up with it, he wanted his gearless one for the races.
For the Kids of Steel race, he seemed OK on the way out, but I noticed it was taking him a long time to complete. Â As I had mentioned before, he was in last place in his own imagination, and I think he got discouraged and lacked motivation. Â It was also very hot that day.
For the Nicola’s Tri event, we had a major problem or two. Â The course is looped, and though Shark Boy must have listened to 4-5 briefings where the volunteer had the kids repeat back that the bike course had 3 loops, I’m not sure the info really took hold. Â I couldn’t follow him through transition, so once he was out of the pool I raced to a spot on the bike course. Â I saw him struggling to gain momentum while pedalling furiously, and I knew what the problem was: his chain had come off. Â I ran over, had him dismount and showed him briefly how to fix it, then sent him on his way.
Of course this meant I was out of position to tell him to stay on course when he completed the first loop and went straight back into transition….
Run
…and furthermore, he somehow took a short cut on the run course and crossed the finish line after less than 200 m. Â He knows how long a 1 km run should feel like (especially from 5 Peaks races of the past), so I can only surmise that he was discouraged to the point where he just wanted this thing over with.
Though he was given a medal, the official results showed ‘DQ’ as his time made no sense in relationship to his competitors who went much further. Â It took some serious mother and father pep talk to cheer him up the rest of the day, as we’ve all had results that we weren’t happy with (including my own DNS) that weren’t always the results of bad performance.
For the Kinetico Kids of Steel event, there was no disaster, but he did walk segments of the run course, and I’m still attributing that to discouragement and heat.
He’s placed better in 5 Peaks trail races, than in triathlons so far. Â I guess I’m a little discouraged myself to think that at age 7 (meaning he competes with 8 and 9 year-olds) he’s at a level where the training and mental game have to be already pretty high, but it’s actually a good thing for someone who’s had a lot of things come to him fairly naturally (e.g. riding a bike without training wheels by age 3) to learn about the benefits of practice and work ethic. Â I just hope he’ll continue to view triathlons as fun. Â In addition to being well versed in the technique of transition, he also knows how to blame his equipment in order to justify further spending – he’s been bugging me to get him a road bike which will ride faster than the mountain bike.
Miscellaneous Event Details
Both events are great days out for the family with bouncy castles, face painting and barbecue.
The volunteers do a lot to make the participants and their families feel welcomed, informed and safe. Â I love doing triathlon, but I love it even more when the whole family can get involved!
